Friday, February 27, 2009

Radiometer

When this little thing stops I know I haven't gone blind, it's just dark.

Heaven help me when it's dark but I can still hear it whirring around.

Submitted for Shutterday: SCIENCE!
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Wednesday, February 25, 2009

The Sun Over Manhattan

The Sun is a very large piece of coal that floats in the sky somewhere over Staten Island. It burns brightly night and day but you can't see it at night because it is covered with a large blanket to allow people to sleep.

I had to change the title because it made me thinkof that horrible 80's song by Christopher Cross. GAH.

NOW THIS EXPLANATION IS DOING THE SAME THING! GAH!

This science fact filled post submitted to Photosharks: Fire.

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THIS is why your lowly and humble photographic servant STAYS IN!

I fell twice today. GAH! IN MY NICE COAT!

The first time was sort of fun because I shouldered a snowbank and was almost buried.

But the second time was on black ice and would have KILLED a lesser man. (If there was one)

This is what the front of my incredible calves look like.

CLICK HERE TO SEE MY ORIGINAL CALF PORN. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO!

Until then, I'm not leaving the house without my walker AGAIN!

(Ok, MAAAYBE I won't need call my friend who works at Otto Bock. Even though he's been TRYING to get me into their products.)

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The Canon 28-135 1:3.5-5.6 IS from Laanba Lens Co Inc.

Did your lowly and humble photographic servant REALLY need this SWEET Canon lens? Not really. It's a range that I have covered with several others. But what I DID NOT have was a lens with such a great savings or from such a prominent source!!

My dear, close, personal friend Laurie Ballesteros was talking about upgrading her camera body from her well used XT to a 50D. Nice jump. But I talked her into getting the KIT and selling me the lens at a great savings. And..SHE DID.

So whyyyy did I want this lens so badly?

Because with any luck, now that she has TOUCHED it (and included some sweet flickr and Texas swag) I can get some of her cooties and take photos nearly as good as hers. I hardly ever tell her how talented I think she is because I like to keep my friends even more humble than myself. I razz her terribly and she takes it very well. (She even has reason to block me forever, but she is fiercely loyal once she befriends you and will even get you a sweet deal on a lens.)

If you want to see what I aspire to go check her out, especially her plastic stuff that makes me so jealous I could just spit.
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Sunday, February 22, 2009

WTF I Have Been Doing

Gentle Viewer Anonymous writes:

Dear lowly and humble photographic servant. What have you been doing?

So I wrote back that I've been enjoying the winter etc... and immediately get back...

NO, DUMBASS! I MEAN WITH YOUR BLOG! WTF have you been DOING? IT'S FULL OF CRAP!

love, a concerned Gentle Viewer.

OOOOooh. I get it now. Yeah. I haven't been taking much because as much as I've been enjoying the winter, it's not particularly productive photowise and in the past I've had extensive archives to dig through. I still have them, they are just dug through.

I've also been in that Blackhole known as facebook and putting together things on flickr. Above of which is a sample.

Some of my favorite portraits collected into one set.

(also known as 'just pictures of people')

Go see if you are there. If not. WHY NOT?

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Thursday, February 19, 2009

When I'm Weeping One Day When I Am Very Old

About what a mediocre photographer I stayed all my life you can remind me of this submission for Photsharks: Size and I'll nod, wipe my tears, and go back to eating my oatmeal.
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Not So Pretty in Pink

Submitted to Thursday Challenge: Pink
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Monday, February 16, 2009

One Of The Really Nice Things About Being your lowly and humble photographic servant

Is letters like this:

"Dear lowly and humble photographic servant,

I'm a hot, young, married, stewardess/aerobics instructor looking to have portraits of an intimate nature taken of me as a 1st anniversary gift for my husband who lifts and builds more things before lunch than you could in a lifetime. We've seen your website and would be very comfortable having you take these photos for us because you are clearly GAY.

Call us with your rates.

Love,

a hot, young, married, stewardess/aerobics instructor"


Yes, if you are looking for portraits of an intimate nature I am the clearly GAY photographer of your dreams as long as you don't ask me to prove it.

The OTHER nice thing is the people who I wouldn't otherwise meet, which encompasses everyone who doesn't live in my building (Hello, Landlords) or the people who sometimes see me at work.

One of those people is the lovely Heather McCarthy, Director of the American Folk Festival and Understated Comic Genius who presented me with the above book as a gift for taking some portraits of her (Of a Safe For Work variety!). She very diplomatically said she picked it up at an auction because she knows I like vintage things and have a passing interest in photography OR because she is hoping for GOOD pictures next time.

Thank you, Heather! :)

Sincerely, your lowly and humble (Every-Day) photographic servant.

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Saturday, February 14, 2009

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

What The???



Oh, you Mocking GEICO Bastards!!

This is why I'm insured with AllState.

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Friday, February 06, 2009

This is (My friend Jeff's Band called something to do with the girl..Sister something?)




Here is what I earned in a few short minutes tonight:

There is always some bastard hiding in the dark.
There is always some bastard microphone looking like it's poking someone in the eye.
There is always some bastard trying to get by you or blocking you.
There is always some bastard massively dark area and massively bright area to throw off the metering.
There is always some bastard syllable distorting a face so that you KNOW they will hate how they look.
There is always some bastard loud music hating photographer whining about something.
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Why Lensbaby?

Because if it feels almost impossible to shoot, a Lensbaby doesn't make it any harder.
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Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Lensbaby 3G 2.8

I was orderted to post something over the fiber thing if I ever wanted to get laid again.

To which I responded "Again???'"
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Sunday, February 01, 2009

The Thing of the Moment's Guide To Things You Will Thank Me For Later®

These are delicious.

...considering they are mostly WOOD.

And they are small.

Never....and I mean NEVER....EVER...eat 3 at a time.

That's all I'm saying.

You are welcome.
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Jen White